First. Sometimes this computer stuff makes me need to run down to the highway and back to blow off steam… I get frustrated easy when I know what I want to do or say and electronics stop me.
I forgot my password or typed it in wrong and was made to wait for 30 minutes to reset…And still it messed with me. I must love you and/or this connecting thing, because I hung in here; but I am silly to act like it is for you and you alone. (The truth is that I started this post on Friday and gave my laptop the silent treatment while I was busy being a Farm Girl.)
I want and need to do this. It truly helps me specifically and the part where you listen and read is so motivating… and the comments are so cool. Super cool. I can’t see your face. I can’t hear you breathe. I don’t feel worry. I can’t interpret your response with body language or face moves. I can just be me here… And, you can too.
Preface aside, I had two Wolf experiences this week. It is ironic that I wanted to savor it for myself and then, when I am ready to share, I hit a speed bump.
Computers sort of suck. And. Computers are sort of cool.
It was my Walt week and I usually schedule Business or Doctor stuff in the City at the same time. So. Early Wednesday morning I woke up feeling rested and blessed that I had ten minutes to stare at the trees outside my window. We needed to be on the road by 7am. I pop out to the Family room with the huge picture window to try some Yoga moves and I see three deer galloping like happy horses down in the field…
Just perky and jumpy and bony. Just alive. Living.
Deer are all around here and not such a big deal to us locals. 🙂 But. Have you seen one?
I love all animals and wow this Planet has tons…
We make it to the Jeep in time to stop at the Mortgage Title Company in the next town. I needed to deal with paperwork regarding my Mom and Dad and my brother and this 80 acres and what will be what. My mom died and her name was on this Deed. We needed to remove her name. Avoiding Probate stuff…pfft.
Anyway. I am waiting for the lovely girl to process my papers and she gets a call and puts me in a room with a stuffed White Wolf and I love dogs and so I just wanted a closer look. She leaves to answer the phone and I check it out. This White Wolf was scrawny and stuffed and posed on a log but still a wolf/dog. I felt its’ body and paws. The paws were huge, the fur softish. But like it had hairspray on it. I WAS grossed out at its’ fate. I love dogs. Now I love Wolves too…
Meanwhile, Walt is chillin with his Ipad in the waiting room…
We do our business and hit the road… I am thinking all day about: I wonder how that Wolf ended up stuffed in a conference room in Milltown , Wisconsin. And are there white wolves around here or did they ship it from someplace? And when will I get a puppy?
The next day.
Backpack and boy and snacks in the Jeep for our 90 minute ride to Minneapolis and off we go…
The Sun as it rises makes everything reddish but the snow in the shade is blueish and the Horses are out eating what they eat and I, at my age, (spiritual more than chronological), just revel revel revel…, 55 miles per hour and there are Goats and Sheep grazing on what they can or do, and Eagles are looking for roadkill to munch. I see a group of lady Pheasants running for cover. Things are melting here too fast!
My mornings always start with a maybe this or a maybe that. One never knows with an Autistic teenager…
I am worshipping the beauty here… I am always trying to be in a Thankful State of Mind anyway, BUT. The sky and the trees and the colors of nature are what this whole life experience for me is all about. Blessed Blessed Blessed. Perfect morning!
It’s like in the olden days when the needle on the record is rocking and rolling and then just hits a snag and I see what I had to see and after a quick argue in my head, I pull over…scratch .
Even driving fast and having a brain that is so so busy: I see this maybe dog sleeping on the bridge over the creek and can’t not stop. I really do just instantly and instinctually pull over. I sit for a sec. I know I’m just a human and a huge thing with huge fur is in a pile on a tiny bridge over a creek. I realize what this experience could do to me possibly. ALL I KNOW is that if it was my dog I would want someone to say something. Do something.
I stop. I back up.
Ohh people It was not a dog. Oh no it is not sleeping…
It was an amazingly, stunningly, gorgeous creature.
It was just there with no crime scene drama. Like it was just asleep.
I had backed up close and tiptoed in. This was a real wolf.
So dignified. So Regal.
It wasn’t bloody or mangled. Just asleep -like. But stiff legs. My heart is pounding. There are no cars whizzing by and no house in sight… Just me and Oh My Gosh I love dogs like crazy so I eased over and touched it. The fur has so many layers. Super soft on the inside. Thicker that you could ever imagine but the softest smoothest delicate touch. It felt like nothing else I have ever felt. I will never be able to adequately describe it and I will never ever forget it. I am obviously covered in tears. Not sobs but just eyes leaking and leaking. Anyway…
It was fat and healthy looking and I wished it could be my eternal companion… I imagined us running in the woods and kayaking and cruising in the Jeep. Silly girl stuff.
I walked back to the car to get my phone to call the DNR to come and get it. I wasn’t leaving it there. I also asked Walt to come see…
I can’t say come see this or check this out; I can only say, “I need help will you help?”
Walt gets out of the Jeep and walks over to the Wolf and picks up a rock and tosses it into the stream and says, ” It’s dead”, and goes back to the car…
His the Yin to my Yang….
I can’t fight with pictures for this post and the ones you make in your mind are way better anyway. 🙂 I feel so great getting this one out.
I have another big story you will love soon…:D mmmm Trees