Ok.  Single or not,  you might be interested to find out how we ended up with this big deal, the big day, the day that can make or break something that should be unbreakable to begin with,  if it is truly real…

Valentine’s Day. … Look at this picture below the flowers.

The truth is,  that most men don’t understand that it is about the friends, the family, the others in the office or warehouse or whatever… They all SEE they all ASK.  They all Judge.  It is not easy to not want the Big Barbie Dream House and to not wantto get it in front of everyone that fusses about it and all around us…

Even though it is shallow and we know it.


And.  The stories of men who leave or cheat or lie are everywhere. :/  Women too though.

A real Human who knows and feels that you LOVE  them does not care about the Hallmark holiday trappings…

I will never believe that there are not real amazing people who are worth committing to…

So. Back to the research…    This Valentine’s Day can be traced back to the Pagan Holiday called Lupercalia.


It is a Fertility festival and had been celebrated for hundreds of years before the Romans and Christians cleaned it up.  Like way B.C.

So.   The men of the village get naked and sacrifice two goats and one dog.


Then they make mini skirts, (Loin Cloths), out of goat skin and then,   also,    cut long strips of bloody hairy goat skin to thwack the women.

The women have lined up on the street: the pregnant women are hoping for an easy birth. The bloody hairy goat thrash should help.

The un-pregnant women line up to enhance their fertility by having bloody hairy goat skin whapped on them… that will do it.   In some ways it is no more ridiculous that what the Urban Female does.  More on that later.

So.  That happens, and there is a feast of goats and many things, (organic for sure),  and I could not find out why the Dog was included in the sacrifice, other than that dogs will fornicate anywhere and in front of anyone.

Hence the Fertility Ceremony I guess?

But wait!  Folks it gets more interesting…

After the Thwaping and the Feasting the single ladies wrote their name on a leaf and the men would pick one.

Seriously.  The coupling might last a night or week or month but the next year we all go back into the pile… Unless it works out.  Unless he is the One.  So 1970’s right?

Oh Wow.

I do hope you are still here with me because this is for you!   If Valentine’s Day is about Love then I challenge you, coupled or not to remember who you were just before puberty.  Like before the opposite sex was a big deal, what was a big deal?


I was and am completely nuts for music and puzzles and maps and Encyclopedia Brown and Nancy Drew… I had already nerded out on public television and watched tons of fake wrestling and shows about cars.  I still could spend all darn day at a Car Show.


Elvis was sort of a big deal because my Moms’ mom loved him and I just fell madly in love with Rock and Roll, and my Grandma, but that led me to the Blues…,

I will digress a second.  Lead Belly,  Robert Johnson,  James Brown,  Bessie Smith,  Buddy Guy,  Johnny Cash and oh wow Johnny Cash.

Alright.  To sum up,  this is a call to kidness.  Yes kidness.

You should treat people you love like it’s Valentine’s Day often;  you should treat yourself like it’s Valentine’s Day Everyday

Get thwacked with something.  Be Fertile in every way.  Take a chance on a leaf.  Have faith and hope.  Have some fun.  I got your back. 😉





4 thoughts on “Lupercalia

  1. I found this fascinating. My girlfriend tells me that i need not worry about material wealth in terms of a valentines gift, and i find that interesting. this reminded me of her, because you also draw the conclusion that we shouldn’t base happiness on items or gifts. I love you Julie and I cant wait to see you again.


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